I would just like to say that after reading all my Aunts and Uncles blogs I am slightly freaked out. I say that because I find myself relating to all of you as an adult. I know that I am married and have children and plenty of bills to pay...but on the inside I still very much feel like a little kid. I still get excited about going swimming or going to the zoo. I want to get up on Saturdays and watch cartoons in the morning (like I have any choice). I managed to zip through the rush hour traffic and get home early today. So I decided to sneak home and get on the computer for a few minutes. Email is one of the hardest things to do when the kids are here. So for the first time in a long time I have a chance to sit in an empty house and do whatever I feel like doing. I thought I would just check the blogs and email for a few minutes and rush off to get the kids. It only took a second before I was sucked into blogspot and intently reading all of your blog thoughts. I do think it is strange that I can sit here and read about Laura and Chara and Meredith...cousins I barely even know, and then walk away feeling like I have made some kind of personal contact with them. But back to my original thought about being freaked out. When I'm with my aunts and uncles and cousins I still feel just like I did at Christmas and Thanksgiving when all of us girls would go in the back bedroom and play with grandma's things or invent silly skits or try to be philisophical and sit down to write. But reading (for example Shirley and Randy) my family members blogs I sit here and think about how I am relating to everything on such an equal level. As I am freaked out about being a grown adult I can only guess that it would freak out everyone else too. As much as I feel like that same little girl playing in Grandma's room, I am sure that you all still see me that way too. This has gotten really weird. I didn't ask to grow up and I'm not sure I would like to relate on such an adult level. It only reminds me that 30 is around the corner (yes, I know that it is not old..it's just weird), and life is moving very quickly. Which also means that I will wake up tomorrow and my children will be grown up and I do not like that thought in the slightest. Can someone just please slow us all down?
Friday, June 16, 2006
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4 comments:
Uhmmmm, I still get excited about going swimming or going to the zoo. I am forced to grow older, but I absolutly refuse to grow up.
But I very much can relate with your freaked out feelings. I read the BLOGs that I know are written by all these little girls, and they are talking about their husbands and children.
The years go by faster and faster. Thirty is not old, don't start fretting yet.
hugs,
Randy
Oh I so know what you mean. I told Mom I know more about my cousins now than I ever have all our lives. It is way cool to me to see how everyone is doing and it really freaks me out that they are all grown up. I was weirded out by 30 but now I am 1 year away from the big 4 0. Oh man does that feel weird...especially when my husband is 31.
And as far as growing up, I will so never do that. I am on this interview committee at work and as I talk with my younger co-workers about what we need and politics in general, I sit there wondering if I am mature enough to be on this committee. Sometimes they seem so much more mature than me. I told my good friend this and she about slapped me. What is so weird, I am the old wise on that has been there long enough to know everything. I'm even training my new director/immediate supervisor on things. It's so weird.
And so, in a couple of weeks on my first week of vacation, we have planned a childless evening - Taylor will be with her mom and Tristan with my mom - and we are meeting some friends to hang out and get silly. We will go to a concert at the zoo - our 80's hair bands Poison and Cinderella - and have a grand ole time. I will be the one mashed up against the fence, sweating my brains out, and singing at the top of my lungs and checking out Bret Michaels all over again. He's like Jon Bon Jovi...he's aged well. Not as good as Jon but almost. So on July 6, the nite before my icky last 30 somthing birthday, think of me out there being a kid all over again. I will so be there.
You think YOU'RE freaked out!!! How do you think you old Aunt Shirley feels?!?! You nieces should still be just 12 or 13!
I do agree with what Randy said. As I said in a comment to Meredith, I may be getting older but I am SO not old, mentally. Actually, not physically, either... well, maybe just a few days out of the month! lol I am blessed with good health and so very grateful for that.
I, too, LOVE the zoo and have been trying to get David to take me for the past few months.
I think it would be a good idea to have a family ZOO DAY! Lets all get together and do the zoo!
Hmmm, let's see, what shall I wear???
You just put into words what i have been feeling for a while now. Sometimes I still feel like someone is going to catch me driving and they will haul me off to jail because there is no way I should have a licence.
We've lived so far away for so long that all of my family feels frozen in time. Like you are all waiting at Grandma's house, eating turkey and potato salad, just until we come back for a visit. It still feels weird that we don't drive to Oklahoma for Christmas every year.
It's nice to know that, as seperated as we are, we all have things in common, still.
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