I was watching TV tonight and a particular scene caught my attention. A couple was having a little arguement and the husband said to wife, "You are just like your mother!" This seems to have been the worst thing that he could have said to her. She reacted with disgust. "How could you say such a thing? I will never be anything like my mother!" This got me thinking. Most of the people I know have said at some point or another that they don't ever want to be like their mother or have some problem being compared to their mom. I started wondering, "Wow, how do I raise my children so that they will not have an adversion to being like me?" I'm all for being your own person and finding your own way, but what's so wrong with being like your mom? I want my children to carve their own path, but I certainly hope I don't screw it up so much they decide to never be like me. What an insult! And why is it that I am the only person I know that seems to discuss what kind of mom I want to be or even admits that I put a lot of intentional effort into making myself somewhat of a syllabus. LOL. I know tons of moms of all ages and I've never heard anyone else ever talk about how they grew into their parenthood. My grandma Irene taught me a lot about being a woman and being a lady, but she never talked about the decisions she made about how to mother. My mom has never really said anything about what she thought about as a young mom or what goals she had for herself in that role. Same thing for all of my aunts, cousins, friends, friends mom's, etc. Now that I stop and think about it, it really kind of shocks me that I've never heard anyone else talk about why/how they chose to be the type of mother that they are. Surely everyone thinks about it right? It's pretty important. I can't imagine that it comes so naturally to others that they didn't have to plan it out at least a little. So why doesn't anyone I know ever mention it? I suppose I just like to talk more than others and have no issues with what I share with people vs. what I don't. As we have all learned I don't keep very much to myself. I also over think things. Nevertheless, I just wandered upon this topic tonight. A silly scene in Scrubs got my mind going. So what do the rest of you do? Even if you have been a mom for 20 or 30 years surely there is still some thinking involved. Your children are always at a new age then they were before, or in a new place in their lives than before which must effect you. Whether it is because they are raising their own children or whatever. I don't guess you stop mothering any less just because your kids grow up and start families of their own. Then you get to go on a whole grandparent journey. I would love to hear your thoughts. Perhaps being a mom just happens to be the single most important thing in my life so I talk about it more than other stuff. Not to mention that all I do is go to work or raise my children. So I'm short on any other topics. LOL.
On a side note, I was at the store before work a few mornings ago and noticed a book. The back cover caught my eye. It said something to the effect of "How to get your husband to help with house work." So I immediately bought it. I'm only half way thru the introduction so no new revelations yet. Even if it doesn't teach me how to get my husband to take delight in chores maybe it will make for an amusing read. If it works out though I will be more than happy to share. It never hurts to try right? HA HA!
Friday, May 30, 2008
Monday, May 26, 2008
I'm only bragging just a little bit
I guess I've been a little quiet lately. We went out of town for a week and it's thrown me off I guess. We went to Eufaula for our annual Cox fishing tournament. Oh man, did I make ALOT of observations on that trip. That's a 3 page blog by itself. I will save it for a day where I feel a little more on my game than today. In the mean time, to give my fans something to read (ha ha ha) I will share some predictions I have made recently. For those of you who don't get to see my children often and watch all the funny things they do and hear the insightful things they say, I will share.
It's been really interesting to watch my children develop their little personalities. I think I heard somewhere that by about age 5 a child's personality is almost 100% developed. I've taken the liberty of making some predictions about what my children will be like when they get older. I guess I'll check back in with you in about 10 years and tell you if I was right or not. LOL. I have to preface these remarks by verbalizing that all these things I have noticed are traits they have come up with on their own. I really let them be themselves and encourage the interests they come up with on their own.
Caden is 4 1/2 now. He loves science. He has taught himself to read numbers by using the remote control. LOL. He watches lots of nature shows and science fiction stuff for kids. He can tell you all kinds of things about just about every animal there is. He's always telling me something about random animals and their habits that I didn't know. I can thank Bindi the jungle girl for that. He loves dinosaurs. He can rattle off their names while I stutter just trying to pronounce them. He surprised me one day by telling me how many planets there are, which one we live on, and them naming them all correctly. He tells me all about outer space. I think he is going to excel in science and biology. He does so many things that remind me of things I do myself. He and I are alot alike. I can tell that he observes people and situations like I do. He communicates very well and seems particular about the words he chooses. I would not be surprised if he grows up with a love for writing. He's very outgoing. He has no problems running up to any kid anywhere and making a new best friend. He's polite and mellow. He tends to go with the flow and set his own pace for things. He is a social butterfly. He sometimes will let people push his buttons for quite a long time without reacting, but eventually if you push too hard he will get irritated and sock you in the nose. He loves his father and anything Chris is interested in is an interest of his too. With both people and activities. In general, he's just a pretty cool kid to be around. He makes being a parent pretty easy. I think he's going to be the kid in school that everyone likes. He is a really smart kid. I think he'll be great at science and english, but struggle in math. I think that he will always be super skinny. LOL. I think he'll want to play baseball and golf. At least right now he couldn't care less about basketball and he'd have to gain a massive amount of weight to play football. I'm okay with no football though. His face is too pretty for all that smashing around.
Macy, oh my little Macy. She is so set in her ways. She's the very definition of girl. She never leaves the house without her purse. She always has on lip gloss and begs for more makeup. It's a chore to get her to wear pants or anything that isn't pink. If she could wear pink dresses every day she would be a happy girl. She changes clothes at least 7 times a day. So much so that I'm considering emptying her whole dresser and hanging everything up where she can't reach it. She has no fear. Caden and I severly dislike going fast in cars and boats or motocycles. Macy and Chris throw their hands in the air and yell "Weeeee!" the faster and faster they go. She is a risk taker, which I am sure as she gets older will both get her in trouble and afford her a few opportunities. Courtesy of Dora the Explorer, Macy can count in spanish just as well as she can in english. She is not quite 3 and she can count to 20 in 2 languages. I'm impressed. She is LOUD and sometimes gross. LOL. She belches at the dinner table in public which mortifies me. She thinks farting is hilarious and is the first to take credit when the room stinks up. As much as she is a girly princess, she is always always always covered in dirt and food. Caden even as a baby really gets dirty. Macy is my little pigpen. You can almost see the cloud of dirt following her around. I can wipe her face and wash her hands, five minutes later she is covered in dirt again. This child is a bottomless food pit. I can't order her a regular happy meal. She always has to have extra chicken nuggets. I've seen her eat 12-15 nuggets in one sitting more than a few times. She is going to make an excellent mother. She loves her baby dolls and every one of them is as real to her as she is to me. She corrects me when I am wrong. She counts to 3 and threatens spankings if we are not doing what she thinks we should be doing. She often sticks out her little hip with her hand firmly attached to it, while the other hand sternly has a finger pointed straight at you, all the while she is seriously giving instructions. She can be stern but she is also very loving. She doesn't give out hugs and kisses to just anyone. You have to be someone special. But she takes care of her babies and looks after her big brother. When she gets in trouble she cries for Caden and he scoops her up and tells her everything will be okay. I predict that her teenage years will torture me tremendously and she have many attempts at sneaking out her window at night. She will be wild. She will date boys with too many tattoos and I will have to take a variety of medications to stay sane. LOL. I think she will be sassy and pretty and tough. I refuse to let her be a mean girl. We are working on our manners. She starts preschool in the fall and I'm excited to see how she will handle stepping out on her own for the first time.
What else? My children love McDonalds and chinese food. I'm extremely proud that they both like salad. They are good kids and I am proud that they are mine. They get along with everyone they meet. Macy can be a little selective, but as a girl I appreciate that. :) I wish they could spend more time with my aunts and uncles. They only have 1 uncle. They will have no cousins. That makes me very sad. I really enjoyed my ten thousand cousins growing up. Good thing that Chris and I have a lot of friends. They can pretend all their children are their cousins. Enough mama babble from me for one night. When I get around to posting about our Eufaula trip it will be a must read. I am thoroughly amused by all the things I observed that week.
Okay then. I have broken the silence. I will pick back up my regular blogging schedule soon. LOL. Anyone who is interested Caden has a tball game on Friday night! Let me know if you'd like to come.
It's been really interesting to watch my children develop their little personalities. I think I heard somewhere that by about age 5 a child's personality is almost 100% developed. I've taken the liberty of making some predictions about what my children will be like when they get older. I guess I'll check back in with you in about 10 years and tell you if I was right or not. LOL. I have to preface these remarks by verbalizing that all these things I have noticed are traits they have come up with on their own. I really let them be themselves and encourage the interests they come up with on their own.
Caden is 4 1/2 now. He loves science. He has taught himself to read numbers by using the remote control. LOL. He watches lots of nature shows and science fiction stuff for kids. He can tell you all kinds of things about just about every animal there is. He's always telling me something about random animals and their habits that I didn't know. I can thank Bindi the jungle girl for that. He loves dinosaurs. He can rattle off their names while I stutter just trying to pronounce them. He surprised me one day by telling me how many planets there are, which one we live on, and them naming them all correctly. He tells me all about outer space. I think he is going to excel in science and biology. He does so many things that remind me of things I do myself. He and I are alot alike. I can tell that he observes people and situations like I do. He communicates very well and seems particular about the words he chooses. I would not be surprised if he grows up with a love for writing. He's very outgoing. He has no problems running up to any kid anywhere and making a new best friend. He's polite and mellow. He tends to go with the flow and set his own pace for things. He is a social butterfly. He sometimes will let people push his buttons for quite a long time without reacting, but eventually if you push too hard he will get irritated and sock you in the nose. He loves his father and anything Chris is interested in is an interest of his too. With both people and activities. In general, he's just a pretty cool kid to be around. He makes being a parent pretty easy. I think he's going to be the kid in school that everyone likes. He is a really smart kid. I think he'll be great at science and english, but struggle in math. I think that he will always be super skinny. LOL. I think he'll want to play baseball and golf. At least right now he couldn't care less about basketball and he'd have to gain a massive amount of weight to play football. I'm okay with no football though. His face is too pretty for all that smashing around.
Macy, oh my little Macy. She is so set in her ways. She's the very definition of girl. She never leaves the house without her purse. She always has on lip gloss and begs for more makeup. It's a chore to get her to wear pants or anything that isn't pink. If she could wear pink dresses every day she would be a happy girl. She changes clothes at least 7 times a day. So much so that I'm considering emptying her whole dresser and hanging everything up where she can't reach it. She has no fear. Caden and I severly dislike going fast in cars and boats or motocycles. Macy and Chris throw their hands in the air and yell "Weeeee!" the faster and faster they go. She is a risk taker, which I am sure as she gets older will both get her in trouble and afford her a few opportunities. Courtesy of Dora the Explorer, Macy can count in spanish just as well as she can in english. She is not quite 3 and she can count to 20 in 2 languages. I'm impressed. She is LOUD and sometimes gross. LOL. She belches at the dinner table in public which mortifies me. She thinks farting is hilarious and is the first to take credit when the room stinks up. As much as she is a girly princess, she is always always always covered in dirt and food. Caden even as a baby really gets dirty. Macy is my little pigpen. You can almost see the cloud of dirt following her around. I can wipe her face and wash her hands, five minutes later she is covered in dirt again. This child is a bottomless food pit. I can't order her a regular happy meal. She always has to have extra chicken nuggets. I've seen her eat 12-15 nuggets in one sitting more than a few times. She is going to make an excellent mother. She loves her baby dolls and every one of them is as real to her as she is to me. She corrects me when I am wrong. She counts to 3 and threatens spankings if we are not doing what she thinks we should be doing. She often sticks out her little hip with her hand firmly attached to it, while the other hand sternly has a finger pointed straight at you, all the while she is seriously giving instructions. She can be stern but she is also very loving. She doesn't give out hugs and kisses to just anyone. You have to be someone special. But she takes care of her babies and looks after her big brother. When she gets in trouble she cries for Caden and he scoops her up and tells her everything will be okay. I predict that her teenage years will torture me tremendously and she have many attempts at sneaking out her window at night. She will be wild. She will date boys with too many tattoos and I will have to take a variety of medications to stay sane. LOL. I think she will be sassy and pretty and tough. I refuse to let her be a mean girl. We are working on our manners. She starts preschool in the fall and I'm excited to see how she will handle stepping out on her own for the first time.
What else? My children love McDonalds and chinese food. I'm extremely proud that they both like salad. They are good kids and I am proud that they are mine. They get along with everyone they meet. Macy can be a little selective, but as a girl I appreciate that. :) I wish they could spend more time with my aunts and uncles. They only have 1 uncle. They will have no cousins. That makes me very sad. I really enjoyed my ten thousand cousins growing up. Good thing that Chris and I have a lot of friends. They can pretend all their children are their cousins. Enough mama babble from me for one night. When I get around to posting about our Eufaula trip it will be a must read. I am thoroughly amused by all the things I observed that week.
Okay then. I have broken the silence. I will pick back up my regular blogging schedule soon. LOL. Anyone who is interested Caden has a tball game on Friday night! Let me know if you'd like to come.
Saturday, May 10, 2008
Friday, May 09, 2008
Happy Mothers Day from a very short soap box
I have seen several of my friends or people I know in other manners grow up and drift away from their families. I've heard people say, "I have just grown up now." or "I have a new family with my husband and/or children now." or "My family doesn't understand my life now or where/who I am now." This both disgusts me and makes me sad. It's mother's day weekend which has me thinking about my mother, her mother, myself as a mother, parenting and family in general. It doesn't matter how old you are, who you are now vs. who you were as a kid, who you married or where you live. None of us would be what we are now if it weren't for the family that raised us, loved us and supported us thru every scraped knee, school play, dance recital, football game, school dance, slumber party, broken heart, science fair project, and day to day life of being a growing kid. Just because we marry or start families of our own doesn't mean that we know better than our parents did. I am thankful to my parents for allowing me the freedom to grow and change and become my own person. I'm also thankful for their protective nature and their interest in my life. I'm irritated with those that have loving parents that just walk away because they think what they have now is better. Young adults underestimate the understanding of their parents. There are plenty of people out there that have horrible parents that weren't there and didn't care. For those of us that did have kind caring parents that have judged our families or simply walked away, shame on you. How is it so easy to lose sight of the blessing of a family that cares? I have to say that is laziness and pure selfishness. If you weren't beaten, abused, raped, molested or neglected and you've decided your family isn't good enough for your grown up life then your soap box has gotten far too high. There are way worse things in life than being loved too much.
So, it's Mother's Day. Tell your mother you love her, even if you haven't talked to her in a long time. Tell your grandmother that you love her while you have the opportunity. People aren't around forever to take for granted. Soften up, get a little mushy this weekend. Buy some construction paper, glitter and glue. Get out the markers. Make your mom a card just like you did when you were 5. It will make her feel like she has a place in the world and that someone appreciates all the sleepless baby nights, carpools, homemade cookies, house cleaning, and countless other things that go unnoticed in a mother's life. Chances are the majority of her life revolves around you. So give her back at least part of your day this weekend with a phone call or a hug.
Maybe I'm speaking directly at a handful of people I know. Maybe I'm just speaking in general. I just know that being a mother is the most special thing in the world and no Mom should go unnoticed this weekend.
Happy Mother's Day to all!
So, it's Mother's Day. Tell your mother you love her, even if you haven't talked to her in a long time. Tell your grandmother that you love her while you have the opportunity. People aren't around forever to take for granted. Soften up, get a little mushy this weekend. Buy some construction paper, glitter and glue. Get out the markers. Make your mom a card just like you did when you were 5. It will make her feel like she has a place in the world and that someone appreciates all the sleepless baby nights, carpools, homemade cookies, house cleaning, and countless other things that go unnoticed in a mother's life. Chances are the majority of her life revolves around you. So give her back at least part of your day this weekend with a phone call or a hug.
Maybe I'm speaking directly at a handful of people I know. Maybe I'm just speaking in general. I just know that being a mother is the most special thing in the world and no Mom should go unnoticed this weekend.
Happy Mother's Day to all!